I’ve been asked more times than I can count whether I’m an introvert or an extrovert. I love going to parties, meeting new people, and public speaking. I also crave a long, silent walk in the woods alone, and I am a voracious reader. I adore silent retreats, as if they were a weeklong trip to heaven, and sometimes, frankly, I just can’t stand people. 

Temperament tests usually confuse me even more because, more often than not, I end up being the “contradictory” temperaments, like sanguine-melancholic from the ancient temperaments or dominance-steadiness from the DISC personality test. In addition to this, I’ve taken the Clifton Strengths-finder test officially twice now and have not had a single strength overlap between the two sets of results. 

So, after years of discussion, examination, and temperament tests, you’d think I would know now whether I’m an introvert or an extrovert, but with all the information and feedback I have gathered… I still just don’t know. 

How Are Introverts And Extroverts Different?

Jung distinguishes between being an introvert or an extrovert by where you get energy from. Sometimes I get energy from being around people, and sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I get energy from being alone, and sometimes I don’t. Both circumstances, being around people and being alone, give me energy and exhaust me. It depends on so many other factors and has changed radically from one era of my life to the next. 

On top of all this, I’ve been told I’m an “ambivert,” a person who possesses introverted and extroverted traits, depending on the circumstance they find themselves in. 

I just think that’s a copout. Something is wrong with the system when that is the conclusion. 

Frankly… I’m losing faith in the whole distinction. 

But why did I trust it in the first place? Where in the Bible does it say that we are one or the other?

When Did God Invent The Introvert Or Extrovert? 

I think it’s time for another perspective. 

The question boils down to this: is being an introvert or an extrovert a real thing or not? Certainly, it’s something everyone can relate to, but does that mean it’s permanent? Or is it just based on circumstances, mood, upbringing, or personal woundedness? 

These questions led me to start thinking deeply about what being an introvert or extrovert really is, from God’s perspective. I have concluded that the terms themselves are reductionistic and that they are missing something. Let’s go beyond the words and into the philosophical concepts. We find that they are part of a much bigger picture, one that involves so much more than our mere energy levels and immediate social stimuli or lack thereof. 

What Does It Mean To Be An Introvert?

To introvert means to turn inward in the presence of others. It refers specifically to a psychological response to a certain human and social circumstance. There’s no denying that this is a real thing. That’s not my point here at all. My point is that being aware of this psychological reaction, and identifying with it permanently is actually not very helpful in the life of faith, and I’ll tell you why. 

When we really consider personal examples of what we mean when we say “introverts” we tend to mean people who contemplate; people whose interior life and engagement with things around them is deep, rich, and immersive, so much so that silence, focus, and solitude are the only things that keep their sacred interior life safe and sustainable. That place within them is where they find solace, peace, and a well of life-giving grace. This interior life they experience gives them life, color, time to process experiences, and a sense of centeredness that results in energy, revitalization, and peace, and people tend to pull them out of that, especially lots of loud, hyper-social people. 

To turn inward in the presence of others is not necessarily a good thing. In fact, it is arguably a deterrent to a successful life of faith. However, to have a rich interior life, Jesus shows us in the Gospels that connection and engagement with beauty, God, and oneself through silence and solitude is essential to Christian life. And to want to protect that interior richness through solitude and silence is actually something we find Jesus doing regularly throughout the Gospels. It is virtuous and good. 

What Does It Mean Extrovert?

Now, let’s turn to extroverts. 

To extrovert means to turn outward in the presence of others. It also refers to a psychological response. It is certainly a real thing, but it is also not necessarily a good or bad trait. Both an introverted reaction as well as an extroverted reaction are morally and pastorally neutral. Extroversion is certainly helpful at times in social settings, and extroverts, I would say, are “seen” more, but that doesn’t mean anything in the life of faith. It is irrelevant. 

So, what does extroversion look like to God?

I would say that what we really want to say, when we try to describe actual individual people who are extroverts, is that they love connection. 

Connection describes those who love to be together, to relate, to network, if for no other reason than the mere goodness of community and friendship. LIke Jesus, extroverts love to bring people together to celebrate something truly good and lead people into an outward and communal expression of that goodness. 

Irrelevant To The Christian Life?

I think that introversion and extroversion are such spiritually sterile terms, that they are irrelevant to Christian life. Contemplation and connection, however, are not irrelevant. They are not simply psychological reactions to external social stimuli; they are essential faculties of the Christian personality. Not optional, but essential. Not one or the other, but both and. 

The ability to contemplate is to be able to behold, in stillness and receptivity, the goodness around us is the key to a joy filled interior life. This is an essential Christian trait modeled to us, not only by Jesus, but by Mary, and every other saint. It’s that willingness to step away,, and into the “quiet room” of our hearts, to encounter God. This often requires reclusion, quiet, focus and serenity, all the things loved so dearly by “introverts”.  

The ability to connect, relate, and communicate with people is also an essential part of the Christian life. We, as Christians, especially Catholics, have reason to connect and rejoice. We have salvation! We have a reason to sing, to dance, to praise God with shouts of joy. The Pentecost in the Upper Room and every authentic Pentecost after that is led by this concept of togetherness and Judah, by praise and exultation of the goodness of God, and the tearing down of the tower of Babel through the gift of tongues. It’s re-connection at its finest. 

Now these are theological terms. These are activities! These are faculties of the human person that actually mean something applicable in our spiritual and pastoral lives. They are clearly reflected in Scripture, yet they underpin the more basic concepts of introversion and extroversion. They are concepts and experiences that lead us deeper into God and into a full understanding of ourselves. They are holy pathways. 

We are not one or the other. We are not either contemplatives or connectors, limited to one or the other by personal limitations or circumstances. We are called to be both and it is our duty as Christians to develop and expand our capacity for both. Unlike introversion and extroversion, connections and contemplation are actually gifts that we should exercise. They are paradoxically opposites, seemingly opposed, but when both developed, they are able to fill out the human heart to its natural breadth. 

The greatest example of a Person who had a deep capacity for both these traits is Jesus Himself. Who else could go from hours of prayer up in the mountains, to extensive public speaking, to healing and praying with individuals, to liturgical celebrations, to public debates, all in one day, with no apparent lack of competence and comfort?

This is our call. We are called to be confident, competent, and comfortable, fluctuating between highly contemplative moments and highly communicative moments. When we engage fully in each of these faculties, we experience God in completely different ways. 

This requires a willingness to push back against natural attitudes and habitual tendencies and to challenge ourselves to go beyond what we are comfortable with currently. To allow ourselves to be shaped into something new. Every saint went through this purgative formation process, and we are called to do the same. 

Society says to lean into your strengths. Scripture says to lean into your weakness. And St. Paul says to strive after all the spiritual gifts. Rather than remaining stagnant in strength, we are called to be stretched in our weakness. Contemplate, completely, and without reserve. Connect, completely, and without reserve. Live out a range of spiritual gifts, and you will become fully alive. 

Photo by Samantha Gades on Unsplash