When was the last time that you were honest, truly honest? How many of us keep holding onto that delusional aspiration of a safe and comfortable relationship built on external smiles, hollow dialogues, and cheesy silence-fillers. Isn’t it obvious that it is destined to fail? How many times are we swayed and dominated by the stupefying fear manifested in the recurrent thought: “What will he/she think of me?” And why is it so difficult to present ourselves openly–without recurring to a variety of masks and camouflages that are so common in our daily interactions– to the other person?
We all tend to cast out towards the others, hoping to find some source of self-affirmation. We look for a reaffirming smile, look of understanding, an encouraging nod. But, what is it that we are really seeking? Do we even know?
We are all seeking acceptance, friendship, and, ultimately, love. In the end, nothing else will satisfy us. It is a desire that permeates everything we do. Unfortunately, the answer to that desire has been advertised as a 99-cent, caffeine-free, no calorie, no sugar, great-tasting beverage that includes free refills. It is supposed to be something pain-free, low-risk, and full of smooth sailing. And we gullibly believe it.
Fr. Leo On Treating People As Products
But, in reality, every authentic relationship requires those tough and uncomfortable honesty moments, those moments when the mask is removed, and the real person comes out into the light. It is a moment of risk when we sacrifice all control over our image and offer our true identity to other people, placing ourselves vulnerably in their hands, knowing that they are free to accept and love or to reject and despise. It is a moment of courage and sacrifice that is absolutely indispensable.
Those who are unwilling to take this step must resign themselves to daily superficiality. They must become chameleons, changing their colors according to the desires they perceive in others. Every gesture, every look, and every laugh is organized and used to reconstruct themselves so as to incarnate the other’s expectations. And while this road might promise an active social life, numerous acquaintances, and plenty of text messages, it is, nevertheless, one of inner loneliness and great sorrow, as one day you must face the fact you sacrificed your true self for a delusion of approval.
Let us then take advantage of today’s video’s message: the only relationship that’s really worth it, is one based on truth. This doesn’t mean, of course, that we must recklessly blurt out all sorts of private information to everyone we know. Rather, between the two extremes of an inflated self-exposure and a lock-tight self-enclosure, we need to live a healthy openness whose ultimate criterion is charity: revealing our own interior, our weaknesses, and our strengths, to those who are adept to receive and to whom such action would be beneficial.
Questions for Dialogue
How many of my relationships are based on the truth? Do I tend to be honest with those around me? Do I tend to demand the same of my friends and loved ones? What fears or defects keep me from being real with others? What do you consider to be a model relationship? Is it one based on the worldly values, or those found in Christ?
Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter!
- What Does Being Open To Life Really Mean?
Open to life. We’ve all heard it, and for the most part, think we know what it means. For those who are outside the Church, or perhaps those Catholics who have done little more than get their feet wet in this beautiful thing we call Catholicism, the idea of being “open to life” sounds suffocating – […] - Jesus, The Master Psychologist: Unworthy Of Self-Worth?
So you also, when you have done all that is commanded you, say, “We are unworthy servants.” — Luke 17:10 What grade would Jesus receive in a college counseling class today? Would He even pass? To counsel someone to call himself an “unworthy servant” would be asking for an F, as it would collide headlong […] - August Is Devoted To The Immaculate Heart Of Mary | Mark Your Calendar!
Did you know that each month has a traditional Catholic devotion? This year, let’s focus on each devotion month-by-month to grow in our faith and traditions! Make yourself notes, write it on your calendar, and pray a specific prayer each day of the month to remember. You could use a prayer already associated with the […] - 4 Reasons Not To Give Up On NFP When It Gets Hard
Let’s face it. As wonderful as the idea of Natural Family Planning (NFP) can sound, the reality for many couples can be far from that beautiful ideal. A common thread amongst frustrated couples trudging their way through the trenches of NFP is that the reality of following the Church teaching against contraception can be far […] - 4 Olympic Athletes Who Ask The Blessed Mother For Help
By now, you’ve probably been drawn into the competition, the passion, and the excitement of the Summer Olympics taking place in Toyko. The athletes are an inspiration to all as they give everything they have to the sport that they have spent many hours perfecting. Most of these men and women depend on trainers, coaches, […]
Related content:
Don’t Treat People The Way They Treat You…Treat Them The Way God Treats You 
Encourage Girls To Treat Each Other As True Sisters In Christ 
Is It Really Love? The Question All Dating Couples Should Ask 
Five Benefits of Dating Catholic 
Start Your Catholic Dating Relationship In The Hands Of God 
LifeTeen presents “Youth MinisTinder” – The Dating App Catholics Have Been Waiting For 
QUIZ: Is It Time To Give Up Dating? 
A Single Twenty-Something Shares Her Most Intimate Concerns About Dating, Relationships, And Chastity 
Pixar Short Perfectly Captures How Parents Feel When Teens Start Dating
