Imagine this: a car full of chatter and laughter as twelve siblings are on their way to Mass. Some are reading the day’s reading, some are whispering jokes, and others are quietly reflecting.
Mass was central to our lives growing up in a family with 12 children. My dad always made it clear that the most important prayer was the Mass.
I truly believe that because the Mass was such a central part of our lives it is what has kept us together as a family. As the saying goes, “a family that prays together, stays together.”
After Mass, we would go home and have dinner together at the long dining table, with my dad at the head and my mum by his side, looking attentively to make sure everyone was comfortable.
The scene reminds me of Psalm 127
Thy wife is a fruitful vine, on the sides of thy house. Thy children as olive plants, round about thy table. Psalm 127:3 D-R
One thing I loved about Sunday dinner was the general knowledge questions my dad would ask; he used this as a way for us to earn some pocket money. This motivated me to read about topics I wouldn’t normally read about. One of the questions he asked us once was if the sun was a star, and yes, it is.
It sparked my curiosity and ignited a desire to learn new things.
Life in a large family was full, vibrant, sometimes chaotic, but absolutely beautiful!
Growing Up Together
One of the greatest gifts of growing up in a large family is companionship.
You were never alone; there was always someone to talk to, laugh with, or lean on.
To this day, I have amazing memories of us:
Going to Mass together
Singing together
Watching movies together
Travelling together…
We also put on plays and created our own entertainment. We shared snacks, clothes, and just about everything else.
These moments were precious. There was always something happening and always someone to share with.
Some Things That Made It Work
I truly believe that having a structure in the home was really helpful. My dad was the primary provider and also provided discipline and structure in the home. He made sure God was the center of the family.
Our family witnessed so many blessings and miracles.
We were blessed to have Priests visit our home and teach us the Faith.
My dad also had a friend who taught us some beautiful Catholic songs when we were young. We used to sing those songs after night prayers, and we still remember those songs to this day. One of my sisters has taught her children some of these songs, and it is so nice to see the legacy spreading across to the next generation.
My mother is very kind. She learned about our various personality types and made sure we felt seen. She knew our strengths and our struggles.
I remember how she would come and sit with me when I got back from school. She would let me tell her how my day was going. I have always felt like I can tell my mum anything, and we are still very close.
A Life That Stays Connected
Many of us live so far apart now, but we try to stay connected. No matter the distance, we try to stay in each other’s lives.
I love it when my siblings share photos and videos of their birthdays and other special celebrations. Sometimes we come together for weddings, and it’s always so beautiful!
I love my niece and nephews and love seeing pictures and videos of them.
Expanding The Capacity To Love
A long time ago, I read an article about a woman with twenty children. She said that each child expanded her capacity to love.
Love grows, and the more we make sacrifices and give love, the more it grows.
This was very true in my family. As we had more siblings, we grew to love them, and now we cannot imagine life without them.
Growing up in a large family teaches you sacrificial love. You learn to give of yourself even when it is hard.
Just as stones on a shore get refined because the sand is constantly rubbing against them, that’s how we got refined by growing up in a large family.
Growing up in a large family has had a great impact on me. It has affected the way I relate to others and serve others.
Children represent love, and love multiplies in a large family.
Large families are not easy, but they are undeniably beautiful.
They teach you that joy can be found in the simplest things- around a dinner table, in laughter, in prayer, and in presence.
They remind you that love is not divided when shared – it is multiplied, in fact St Augustine has a quote in this
“When large numbers of people share their joy in common, the happiness of each is greater because each adds fuel to the other’s flame.”
St Augustine
Most importantly, large families teach you that being part of something greater than yourself is one of life’s greatest blessings!
Image: Photo by Rajiv Perera on Unsplash
